The Monkees were once a punch line to every joke about
inauthentic, cheesy pop for toddlers. In a century in which pop is no longer a
pejorative, few care about the manufactured manner in which Mike, Micky, Davy,
and Peter were assembled, and many now know about their victorious struggle to
wrest control of their music. Today, The Monkees are more respected than they
ever were in the days when they outsold The Beatles and the Stones.
As all of you Psychobabblers know, Psychobabble loves The
Monkees, but that doesn’t mean their back catalog is unimpeachable. The fact
that an uncountable multitude of writers, producers, and musicians contributed
to The Monkees’ output means that some really bad stuff was recorded (see “Teen
Tiny Gnome”, the juvenile junk allegedly responsible for Boyce & Hart’s
ousting as main Monkees producers) and released (see “The Day We Fall in Love”,
the sappy pap regularly regarded as worst Monkees track of all time). Frankly, The
Monkees never released a perfect album. Even the wonderful Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD. contains one “this
does not belong” track, both because “Hard to Believe” was not as edgy as its
LP mates (on which the cutesiest sounding track is about a “Hell’s Angels gang
bang.” Gross.) and because it was not made with the democratic band input that
went into the other tracks. I’ve tried to maintain the chronology of when the tracks were recorded as much as
possible, though Instant Replay is
still a bit of a chronological hodgepodge in keeping with the original album’s
semi-compilation format.
Consequently, it has become mildly fashionable among Monkees
fans to “re-imagine” each of the group’s albums. What follows is Psychobabble’s
bid in this pre-fab fad and my personal attempt to best the two Monkees box
sets already in existence. Within the confines of four CDs, you will have
alternate and utterly perfect versions of each of The Monkees’ nine
original-phase albums. Therefore we shall call this edition of Psychobabble’s
Perfect Box Set Recipe Alternate Titles (see
the UK single release of “Randy Scouse Git).
On Alternate Titles,
you will find a reduction in the more bubblegum side of The Monkees (which
means more Mike but less Davy—sorry, Marcia Brady). You’ll also notice that
Peter finally gets his due on The Birds,
The Bees, & The Monkees and Mike now classes up Changes. Since there’s more good stuff than would fit onto a
standard twelve-track album, some of the discs include a few bonus tracks as
well. The selection is also not solely based on personal opinion. I never had a beef with “Laugh”, but since it is one of the least-loved tracks among my fellow Monkee Maniacs, I ditched it. On the flip side, I included “Daydream Believer” even though I’m not a fan of it because most of my fellow Monkee Maniacs looooove it. And as always, Psychobabble’s
Perfect Box Set Recipe requires you to actually burn some discs—mere
playlists will not suffice and may result in your expulsion from the
Psychobabble Secret Society of Groovy Ghouls, Retro Rockers, & Kooky
Cultists ©!
NOTE! Disc Three
will require you to make two edits using Audacity or some other such
audio file-editing tool. Since Head
is pretty much a perfect album, and we want to include as much of it as
possible, you will have to edit the whole “Swami” section out of its final
track, leaving only Ken Thorne’s “Plus Strings”. Because “Porpoise Song” must
have its mesmerizing drone coda not included on the soundtrack album, you’ll
either have to clip that coda from the single version on Listen to the Band box set and include it as its own track or live
with a very awkward transition from “Opening Ceremony” to the single version of
“Porpoise Song”. I never said this would not involve a bit of elbow grease.
ALSO NOTE! All
songs are their standard versions released in the sixties and seventies unless
otherwise noted. Whether you use the stereo or mono mixes is entirely up to
you, though I personally recommend mono for the first two albums (which is why I went with the Deluxe Edition as opposed to the stereo-only standard edition) and “Magnolia
Simms” and stereo for all else.
Psychobabble’s
Perfect Box Set Recipe: The Monkees: Alternate
Titles
INGREDIENTS
4 Blank CDRs
The Monkees (Deluxe
Edition)
More of The Monkees (Deluxe
Edition)
Headquarters
Pisces, Aquarius,
Capricorn, & Jones, LTD.
The Birds, The Bees,
& The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)
Head
Instant Replay
The Monkees Present
Changes
Missing Links
Missing Links Vol. 2
Missing Links Vol. 3
Listen to the Band
(Box Set)
DIRECTIONS
Disc One
Bonus Track
1. (Theme from) The Monkees (TV Version) [Missing Links Vol. 3]
The Monkees: Alternate Title
2. Last Train to Clarksville [The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
3. I Won’t Be the Same Without Her [The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
4. Saturday’s Child [The
Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
5. I Wanna Be Free (Fast Version) [The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
6. Papa Gene’s Blues The
Monkees [(Deluxe Edition)]
7. Take a Giant Step [The
Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
8. Tomorrow's Gonna Be Another Day [The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
9. This Just Doesn’t Seem to Be My Day [The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
10. I Don’t Think You Know Me [Missing Links]
11. Let’s Dance On [The
Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
12. So Goes Love [Missing
Links]
13. Sweet Young Thing [The
Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
More of The Monkees:
Alternate Title
14. She [More of The
Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
15. Mary Mary [More of
The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
16. Hold on Girl [More
of The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
17. Your Auntie Grizelda [More of The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
18. (I’m Not Your) Steppin’ Stone [More of The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
19. Looking for the Good Times [The Monkees Present]
20. Look Out (Here Comes Tomorrow) [More of The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
21. The Kind of Girl I Could Love [More of The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
22. (I Prithee) Do Not Ask for Love (Davy’s Vocal) [The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
23. Sometime in the Morning [More of The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
24. Of You [Missing
Links]
25. I’m a Believer [More
of The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
Bonus Tracks
26. You Just May Be the One (TV Version) [The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
27. Words (TV Version) [More
of The Monkees (Deluxe Edition)]
28. Valleri (TV Version) [More of The Monkees (Deluxe
Edition)]
29. Tear Drop City [Instant
Replay]
30. A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You [Listen to the Band]
31. Love to Love [Missing
Links Vol. 3]
32. 99 Pounds [Changes]
Disc Two
Bonus Track
1. All of Your Toys [Missing
Links]
Headquarters:
Alternate Title
2. You Told Me [Headquarters]
3. I’ll Spend My Life with You [Headquarters]
4. Forget That Girl [Headquarters]
5. Band 6 [Headquarters]
6. You Just May Be the One [Headquarters]
7. The Girl I Knew Somewhere [Listen to the Band]
8. Shades of Gray [Headquarters]
9. For Pete’s Sake [Headquarters]
10. Mr. Webster [Headquarters]
11. Sunny Girlfriend [Headquarters]
12. Zilch [Headquarters]
13. No Time [Headquarters]
14. Early Morning Blues & Greens [Headquarters]
15. Randy Scouse Git [Headquarters]
Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn,
& Jones, LTD: Alternate Title
16. Salesman [Pisces,
Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
17. She Hangs Out [Pisces,
Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
18. Love Is Only Sleeping [Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
19. Cuddly Toy [Pisces,
Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
20. Words [Pisces,
Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
21. Goin’ Down [Pisces,
Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
22. The Door Into Summer [Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
23. What Am I Doing Hangin’ ‘Round [Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
24. Peter Percival Patterson’s Pet Pig Porky [Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones,
LTD]
25. Pleasant
Valley Sunday [Pisces, Aquarius,
Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
26. Daily Nightly [Pisces,
Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
27. Don’t Call on Me [Pisces,
Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
28. Star Collector [Pisces,
Aquarius, Capricorn, & Jones, LTD]
Bonus Tracks
29. Riu Chiu [Missing
Links Vol. 2]
30. Daydream Believer [The
Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
31. Nine Times Blues [Missing
Links]
32. Alvin [The Birds,
The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
Disc Three
The Birds, The Bees,
& The Monkees: Alternate Title
1. Dream World [The
Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
2. Auntie’s Municipal Court [The Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe
Edition)]
3. Tear the Top Right Off My Head [Missing Links Vol. 3]
4. The Party [Missing
Links]
5. Tapioca Tunda [The
Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
6. Writing Wrongs [The
Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
7. Seeger’s Theme [Missing Links Vol. 2]
8. I’ll Be Back Up On My Feet [The Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
9. P.O. 9847 [The
Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
10. Magnolia Simms [The
Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
11. Valleri [The
Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
12. Merry-Go-Round [Missing
Links Vol. 3]
13. Zor and Zam [The
Birds, The Bees, & The Monkees (Rhino Handmade Deluxe Edition)]
Head: Alternate Title
14. Opening Ceremony [Head]
15. Porpoise Song [Head]
16. Porpoise Song Coda [Listen
to the Band] (SEE NOTE ABOVE)
17. Ditty Diego: War Chant [Head]
18. Circle Sky (original studio version) [Head]
19. Supplicio [Head]
20. Can You Dig It? [Head]
21. Gravy [Head]
22. Superstitious [Head]
23. As We Go Along [Head]
24. Dandruff [Head]
25. Daddy’s Song [Head]
26. Poll [Head]
27. Long Title: Do I Have to Do This All Over Again? [Head]
28. Plus Strings (SEE
NOTE ABOVE)
Instant Replay:
Alternate Title: Side A
29. Through the Looking Glass [Instant Replay]
30. St. Matthew [Missing
Links Vol. 2]
31. The Girl I Left Behind Me [Instant Replay]
32. Just a Game [Instant
Replay]
33. My Share of the Sidewalk [Missing Links]
34. Carlisle Wheeling [Missing Links]
Disc Four
Instant Replay:
Alternate Title: Side B
1. You and I [Instant
Replay]
2. While I Cry [Instant
Replay]
3. D.W. Washburn [Listen to the Band]
4. Don’t Wait for Me [Instant
Replay]
5. A Man without a Dream [Instant Replay]
6. Shorty Blackwell [Instant
Replay]
The Monkees Present:
Alternate Title
7. Little Girl [The
Monkees Present]
8. Good Clean Fun [The
Monkees Present]
9. If I Knew [The
Monkees Present]
10. Bye Bye Baby Bye Bye [The Monkees Present]
11. Never Tell a Woman Yes [The Monkees Present]
12. Someday Man [Listen
to the Band]
13. Steam Engine [Listen
to the Band]
14. Listen to the Band [The
Monkees Present]
15. French Song [The
Monkees Present]
16. Mommy and Daddy [The
Monkees Present]
17. Oklahoma Backroom Dancer [The Monkees Present]
18. Pillow Time [The
Monkees Present]
Changes: Alternate
Title
19. Oh My My [Changes]
20. Some of Shelley’s Blues [Missing Links Vol. 2]
21. Ticket on a Ferry Ride [The Monkees Present]
22. Michigan Blackhawk [Missing
Links Vol. 2]
23. You’re So Good to Me [Changes]
24. Midnight Train [Changes]
25. Tell Me Love [Changes]
26. I Love You Better [Changes]
27. How Insensitive [Missing
Links Vol. 3]
28. Angel Band [Missing
Links Vol. 3]
29. Time and Time Again [Changes]
The Monkees debuted on this date in 1966.
The Monkees debuted on this date in 1966.
