Wow. A list of Psychobabble’s
100 Favorite Songs of the 1990s. That’s so cool. It’s totally not like
everyone else in the entire universe hasn’t already listed their 100 favorite
songs of the nineties. Like anyone cares. Whatever. Lists are wack, but I don’t
know… music is pretty cool. I mean, not when they’re like “Oooh, look at me!
I’m a big rock star! My hair is so big and I screw so many groupies!” That is
so eighties. But when they…I don’t know… kind of don’t care so much, I guess
I’m kinda like, “That’s pretty cool. I don’t care so much either.” It’s like
sometimes I think Kurt Cobain is singing about my life, you know? I don’t know what the fuck Bob Pollard is
singing about half the time, but Guided by Voices rock so hard because Bob is
like a forty-year-old schoolteacher or something, so it’s so ironic that he’s a
rock star. And then there’s all the “Women in Rock” (I put that in quotes to
show what I really think of the
mainstream media’s “labels”) like Liz Phair, Tanya Donelly, Mary Timony,
Juliana Hatfield, PJ Harvey, and like, all the others. They are sincerely hella
cool. Sincerely! I’m not even being ironic about how totally dope they are.
Don’t think I’m not being ironic? Oh well. Whatever. Nevermind. Then here’s your mom’s 100 favorite songs of the
nineties.
100. “Over the
Neptune/Mesh Gear Fox” by Guided by Voices
So we get started the way every party must get started…with
a chant of “GBV! GBV! GBV!” Then Bob Pollard is all like, “Rock and Roll!” Then
he’s like “This song does not rock,” which is so cool, because sincerely
admitting that you rock is so lame! But the real irony is that “Over the
Neptune” really does rock! It rocks like Cheap Trick (and not lame Cheap Trick,
like “The Flame”). Then “Over the Neptune” morphs into “Mesh Gear Fox” like
that cop in T2 morphs into water or
whatever, and guess what…it stops rocking but it remains awesome as Guided by
Voices get all psychedelic. It sounds like your dad’s best records… and Uncle
Bob is like your dad’s only cool friend.
99. “I Wanted to Tell
You” by Matthew Sweet
